Family... and where, did you sleep, last night.

So, whenever I get emails from people, they always ask,
"SO... how's the family?!"
And I usually say something like...
"Oh, yeah, they're fine, you know. They are really helpful and such and have taught me a lot. blah blah blah..."
Obviously, that doesn't really mean anything to anybody, so now I'll clarify and also, give you the social context here, because "family" here is WAY different. Especially once you start understanding what is going on in this ridiculous country.

First, in comparison to America, the land of the free, nobody here gets divorced! Of course there are some people with divorced parents. But let's be honest. The number of divorces that I have experienced or am aware of just amongst my immediate family members is three times as many divorces as I have heard of in two months here. My host parents have been happily married for, I don't know, at least 15 years.

Everybody is Catholic! Of course there are some people that aren't catholics, but let's just say that in all of my time here, outside of La Catolica I have only met one Peruvian who said he was an "evangelist"... I think that equates to some type of Protestantism. My host family is Catholic. And in this case, that means they go to mass every Sunday, the parents and one daughter are part of this discussion group/faith/bible study community. In fact, they just got back from a retreat that lasted the weekend. Also, they have pictures of Jesus and various saints and Mary scattered around the house. Now, don't worry. It's not all about Jesus here all the time. If I dont bring up religion or church or anything, it's perfectly fine not to talk about. And it's perfectly fine that I don't go to mass, although I did once. And it was perfectly fine that I did. They are very nice.

Once upon a time, the dad of my family worked for an American mining company in a place called Ilo, to the South of Lima. There, the family lived and worked and went to school and did EVERYTHING (it seems) with other Americans. Their kids went to school with Americans and learned American history and they celebrated American holidays and lived in this isolated community on top of a hill where the mining company imported American everything- products, houses, teachers, values. The way Nancy (the mom) described it, it was like they were living in a fairy tale. And I believe it! This country, let me tell you, is NOT, America.
This part of their history is really important, because very very few Peruvians understand and have lived American culture, probably in it's most idealized form, like my family has. And that helps them understand "us" a lot better.
But also, it says A LOT, about their socioeconomic status... which is apparently, and quite obviously, FAR above the vast vast vast majority of the Peruvian population. If you work(ed) for a mining company and have professional American contacts, and both parents have a degree, and all the kids can speak English and can go to college, and you live in a quiet, residential, safe, neighborhood, you are doing SO good. As far as I'm concerned, I have it REALLY made, right now.

Now, if you know me, you probably know that I'm not really trying to climb to the upper ranks of any social or financial or racial hierarchy, so, while I'm here with this family, I'm enjoying it. But it is also a source of conflict for me, since, every day, I sit on the combi for an hour and watch "the rest" of Lima barely barely barely making it by and I talk with people about the realities of their existences and think about all that type of nonsense.
And also, if you know me, I am generally skeptical about "American values" and mining companies and corporations and Catholicism, so that is also interesting. But, while I'm here, I'm learning a lot from them and they treat us all very very well. In conclusion, the family is good, great, and it is probably what most students want, but I don't really think it's what I want.

Finally, did I mention this? Everybody lives with their parents. Even 30-year-olds. That's just how it is. Now, plug your ears, cover your eyes, or close your browser window if you don't want to read the next part (that deals with sex.... eeeek!), but this is SO interesting!
For us American college students, we live alone, or with our friends, or with our significant other... NOT with our parents (as a general rule). Asimismo, we don't have to worry about our parents if we decide to sleep with someone. That is NOT the case here. So... what do you do then? Obviously, people still have sex, right?.... right?! Right. Well after a few weeks of hypothesizing and inquiries, we Americans finally figured it out. You. a) Go to a hotel (specifically for having sex and decorated as such)... this is your most normal and frequented option, or b) You go back to their house with and meet their parents the next morning or c) You go back to their house and leave that night or d) You back to their house during lunch while everyone is working... or e) you just decide to be overly affectionate in public places (which is just how it is here, everywhere, all the time... in parks, on sidewalks, on the bus, at school... people reminding you of heternormativity EVERYWHERE).

And my final anecdote. I got back from Huaraz at 5:00am and I didn't want to take a taxi home. So I took a combi. On the bus, I sat myself directly behind a couple, who ended up making out, faces and tongues approximately 3 feet in front of mine, for a solid 10 minutes straight until one of them got off. It was a rivetting performance.